I met my husband three weeks before he set off for his OE, spending four months in South America, followed by two years in London. We obviously both felt a strong connection over that three weeks because we kept in touch via email during his time in South America and the day after he arrived in London, I arrived too. We have been together ever since.
I was 27 at the time, he was 24. I remember being amazed to learn he had a Will already and that he’d been mature enough to take care of such a grown up piece of life admin at such a young age. When I’d originally left NZ four years earlier to head to the USA, all I had worried about was whether my suitcase was big enough to fit everything I owned inside! Sound like you too?
I guess I always felt like making a Will meant you were considering dying, a thought which terrified me, and something I didn’t want to focus on for a long time to come. Instead of viewing it as responsible and necessary, even if I didn’t have expensive earthly possessions to bequeath, there were important things I could communicate to my family once I had passed by leaving my wishes documented.
Over the years Shane has urged me to take care of this very important issue and once we had children it became a bit of an issue because of course one of the most important things to determine and leave instruction for in the event of tragedy is what you wish to happen for your children in the event of your death. **fingers in my ears, la la la la*. I continued to avoid it over and over – mostly because I found the whole thing too upsetting and every time we would sit down to discuss what would happen to our kids if something happened to both of us, I would cry.
Our children don’t have godparents and trying to make the decision of who to leave them with in the event of our death was never a clear cut one – any decision we almost settled on seemed unfair to another family member. And because I couldn’t make a decision on this crucial portion of the Will’s content, I avoided signing that document altogether. Perhaps something similar has stopped you ever writing one?
Eighteen months ago, I travelled to California to be Matron (so old!) of Honour for my best friend’s wedding and leaving the country without having my Will taken care of was non-negotiable. I had to put my big girl pants on and finalise my Will before taking that trip. After countless emails back and forwards answering passages of specifications, making little amendments here and there, adding details, removing details and so it went on, I went to our lawyers office (a total hassle with three kids under 6), I filled in all those forms, I signed all those pieces of paper and paid allll that money. It felt like a big deal, it felt overwhelming, but it also felt like such a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders once I finally got it done.
Fast forward to Friday when I am taking my first trip overseas with my husband and leaving the kids at home for the first time ever for this long. I feel super nervous about it. What if something happens while we’re gone! To me! To Shane! To one of my babies! Shane is travelling to referee Samoa v Tonga so his flights are covered with Hawaiian Airlines. The only way we could afford to make this trip work was for me to use my airpoints and fly Air New Zealand. Initially I was a little like “Oh what a shame we’re not flying together”, but literally seconds later I thought
“At least if one of our planes crash, our children will not be orphans!”
Of course he told me I was crazy when I shared my revelation with him, but not surprised, for this is honestly how my mind works 100% of the time!
When I found out recently about an easy, do-it-from-home, do-it-from-your-phone way of creating a Will I wished there was such a thing just two years ago. How easy that would have made my life. It’s no surprise given that so much of our lives are now lived via, controlled alongside and assisted by apps, that there is now one that makes creating a Will a piece of cake – and an affordable piece of cake at that! Kinly is a brand new app designed to help New Zealanders like you and me create and keep their Will up to date. The setting up of a Will can set you back a couple of hundred dollars, and any change made to that document incurs additional costs too. And depending at what stage of life you first set your own Will up, there are bound to be changes that come – buying a property, getting married, adding children to your family, getting divorced (well, someone had to say it) and updating all of those changes cost money. But that was before Kinly.
Kinly has been created with every Kiwi over the age of 18 in mind. The free app helps you to create a simple and legally valid Will that stipulates all of your hearts desires in the event of your passing, including designation of your possessions and special items, who will be the Exector of your Will, wishes around your funeral service and burial or cremation, whether you would like to donate your organs and the most important portion for me: what happens to my children and who I entrust them to. Above and beyond all this, you can also create a video to be played to your loved ones which may sound a little odd and only done on TV or in movies, but the idea of which I especially love – especially if I were to pass when my children were still young, possibly too young to have many memories of me.
Kinly is an extremely affordable way of making a Will and at just $36.95 for the initial creation and just $6.95 after that per year for storage, there really is no excuse for not having taken care of this extremely important piece of life admin.
Is making a will something you’ve ever thought about? Do you have one already? If you are like me and find these things hard to do, I urge you to download the very straightforward app and create a Will for yourself. The cost is not prohibitive and your family (and you) deserve to know that in the unfortunate event of your death, every wish you have has been clearly spelled out.
* * * W I N * * *
You can win a 12 month subscription to Kinly PLUS a $100 Countdown Gift Card + a $50 Gift Card for Kmart!
To enter, simply comment below telling me why you have or haven’t made a Will yet.
Competition end 25/8/16, open to NZ residents only.
* this post has been sponsored by Kinly